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If you’re wondering who the heck Sane Productivity is, it’s us—your old friend, Goal Getter Gossip. We just like this name better. So, without further Adi…
Substack is like that crush who leaves you on read but occasionally tosses you a “Hey, nice post!” just to keep you hooked.
A crush can turn into real love, though. Don’t expect to touch home base on the very first night. You won’t marry on a whim in a Vegas chapel and live happily ever after.
Building an audience on Substack takes time, effort, and thick skin.
Read on to find out why it will be worth your while.
When Substack flirts back (or so you think) 😉
You’re in the honeymoon phase. Everything’s sweet as honey, but also, well, gooey and sticky.
You’re as excited as a little kid who got their first toy. You’re designing the layout, redesigning it, then going back to the original design. You write your first post and imagine thousands of eager subscribers blown away by your talent. They’re lining up to give you their money. By the end of the year, you’ll be working just five hours a week.
But it doesn’t take long for your hopes and dreams to be shattered. You see no likes, few reads, and crickets in the comments. You feel like you’re hosting a dinner party: everyone RSVP’d and then ghosted you.
Substack doesn’t text first 💬
As I said, there’s no home base right away.
Men, you are competing with:
Josh, who knows everyone’s name and has half the school showing up to his pizza fundraiser.
Ryan, the star quarterback who gets applause every Monday morning.
Ben, who remembered her favorite candy and brought it to her locker.
Women, you are competing with:
Liv, who sneaks out to parties and has the best stories.
Emma, the class president who throws pep rallies and aces calculus.
Taylor, the star volleyball player whose Instagram is a highlight reel.
The thing is, Substack’s love language isn’t instant gratification. It’s more of a slow burn with occasional heartbreak.
The harsh truth is—success doesn’t happen overnight. Most creators start small. Even big names struggled before finding their success.
So, what are you gonna do?
Dating tips for a long-term relationship with Substack 👩❤️👨
1. Set realistic expectations
Imagine your audience is just your mom and a bot from Sweden—and write anyway. Your mom loves you, and you love her back! Deep down, you’re seeking love, self-fulfillment, and a sense of belonging.
You have to love what you do. So whatever happens, you’ll know at least you did your best. Growth takes time, and even small wins (like one new subscriber) matter. Never forget that.
2. Find joy in the process
You’re no Hemingway, but pretend you are to your two-person audience. That Swede deserves your best work! Enjoy yourself. Your mom will think you’re great even if you’re not, and that bot? Well, it’s a bot. No judgment there.
Writing should be a reward in itself. It’s not just about numbers. It’s about getting into the zone and watching an empty page fill with words only your mind can create.
An hour will pass, two hours, three maybe, and you’ll think to yourself: “This is the best-spent hour of my life.”
3. Engage, even if it feels awkward
Think of engagement like working the room at a party. Standing awkwardly by the punch bowl won't get you noticed. You need to:
Be the first to say hi (reply to comments)
Join the group conversations (take part in Substack Notes)
Make friends with other wallflowers (network with other writers)
Remember how, after a drink or two, you got the courage to talk to someone? You felt like you couldn’t say the wrong thing. You don’t need alcohol to feel relaxed and welcome in the Substack community.
4. Celebrate little wins
On a note not related to this topic, I’m a film nerd. Here’s a quote from Contact, as Ellie’s father tells her:
“Small moves, Ellie.”
Focus on little steps, like your first paid subscriber or a nice comment. When it happens, celebrate it! You should throw a mini-party every time you see that green ‘+1’ next to subscribers.
Let’s not take things for granted. Take joy in every little win.
Why Substack will love you back (eventually) 💘
Substack plays hard to get. But every creator started small and grew through consistency.
Only the things you work hard for are worth it anyway. So silence your ego, get started, and never stop. Find your voice and stay true to it. It’s the only way to stand out from the noise.
Not everyone will like you, but that’s okay. Not everyone is your audience—and that’s fine.
Remember, the best relationships start with friendship. Substack might play hard to get, but stay true to yourself, keep showing up, and eventually, you'll find your perfect match. Your readers are out there - they just need time to swipe right on your content.
📩 P.S. Share your favorite dating-the-audience story in the comments. Are you still in the awkward first date phase, or have you and your readers already moved in together?